Monday, October 6, 2008

HOLY COW!!!

Today, as I sat and held Elijah in my arms kissing and hugging on him...I just thanked God! At first in my head...just praising Him for my little boy. Thanking Him for how far we have come. Thanking him for getting Elijah through 3 open heart surgeries, and back home. Thanking him that now just 2 short months after surgery he is walking, talking, laughing, playing, eating, and being such an amazing little person! Thanking Him that now 8 weeks later he is on just a simple aspirin 3 times a week and lasix. Than I began to thank Him out loud...THANK YOU GOD! YOU ARE SO FAITHFUL! And then all of the sudden this little wonder, the little miracle resting in my arms looks up and says with a smile "gank gu God!" How awesome is that!!!

It has been 2 months today since I had to sit him in that wagon and watch him be wheeled away down that cold hallway that smells so strong of that "hospital" anestesia/sterile smell. I remember standing there with my hand over my mouth feeling like I couldn't move. Numb! I wanted to run down the hall and sweep him out of that wagon and whisk him right out of the hospital as Jason pulled me into his arms and I broke! I will never forget that moment. It was like time froze. It is forever in my head. That was the single most difficult thing I have ever done...and I have had to do it 3 times, but this time-August 6, 2008, was the most difficult! They were all horrible, don't get me wrong but this time Elijah was different. He was him. He was a little person. He was pretty "normal". Unlike the other times when he was SO sick and I knew if he didn't get the repair we would lose him. And I am thankful! Thankful that we traveled the journey. Thankful that we made it. Thankful that we didn't listen to the lies of the enemy. Thankful that we listened to God's truth and knew that Elijah had and does have a purpose! Thankful that we are DONE! His repair is complete! He won't need another surgery for MANY MANY years...God willing! My heart is just leaping right now with thanks. I have my little boy...my strong little boy! He is here for me to kiss and hug everyday and I am so thankful.

We have learned so many things on this journey. we have grown in so many ways in the last 3 years. We have been tested so many times. We have been helpless and hopeless at times. We have felt lost. We have even thrown in the towel at times. One thing we didn't do though was lose God...He never let us go! He held us, carried us, cried for us, He was there! He never let us down and until this surgery we didn't realize that. We didn't understand "why"...but we didn't need to. God knows why. He chose us for a reason and we have realized that his choice for our lives are a treasure...a blessing! God blessed us with this life! God blessed me and my husband with this amazing little boy that was going to need the strength of both of us. He chose us to teach Elijah. He chose us to do the right things for him...He chose us to walk this road, to travel this journey to glorify Him. To let His love, and His light shine through us. All of us-Jason, me, Hannah, Travis, Elijah-we all have grown closer to God through this storm. We, His babies, His treasures, have made God so proud. We walked the path He chose for us and tredged our way through. We obeyed, we remained steadfast in our faith and our beliefs. So today, this day...means a lot! It means that we got our reward. Our reward of this little boy who sits in my lap and says with so much joy "gank gu God"! I have to say...I feel like the luckiest Mommy in the world and I too say THANK YOU GOD! I hope I have made you proud!

1 comment:

~jen~ said...

AMEN! Thank you GOD!!!!
(sitting here just totally happy and leaping for joy with you!!!)